Here we are—it’s New Year’s Eve and we are on the cusp of 2024! There is a feeling in the air of starting afresh and putting the past (at least the unpleasant parts) behind us. And so, New Year’s offers the hope of new beginnings. Hope can free you. But, all too often, we have a tendency to cling to some unconstructive things that only serve to enslave us. That reminds me of a letter the Apostle Paul wrote to a fellow Christian almost 2,000 years ago. I have to wonder if it was around New Year’s that Paul wrote this letter because it involves “new beginnings.” It was a short letter, but for our purposes this morning, I have shortened it a bit more:
1 This letter is from Paul, a prisoner for preaching the Good News about Christ Jesus. . . I am writing to Philemon, our beloved co-worker. . ., 2 and to the church that meets in [his] house. . . 4 I always thank my God when I pray for you, Philemon, 5 because I keep hearing about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all of God’s people. 6 And I am praying that you will PUT INTO ACTION the generosity that comes from your faith as you understand and experience all the good things we have in Christ. 7 Your love has given me much joy and comfort, my brother, for your kindness has often REFRESHED the hearts of God’s people. 8 That is why I am boldly asking a favor of you. . . 9 . . . Consider this as a request from me—Paul, an old man and now also a prisoner for the sake of Christ Jesus. 10 I appeal to you to show kindness to my child, Onesimus. I became his father in the faith while here in prison. 11 Onesimus hasn’t been of much use to you in the past, but now he is very useful to both of us. 12 I am sending him back to you, and with him comes my own heart. 13 I wanted to keep him here with me while I am in these chains for preaching the Good News, and he would have helped me on your behalf. 14 But I didn’t want to do anything without your consent. I wanted you to help because you were willing, not because you were forced. . . 18 If he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I, PAUL, WRITE THIS WITH MY OWN HAND: I WILL REPAY IT. AND I WON’T MENTION THAT YOU OWE ME YOUR VERY SOUL! 20 Yes, my brother, please do me this favor for the Lord’s sake. Give me this encouragement in Christ. 21 I am confident as I write this letter that you will do what I ask and even more! Philemon 1:1,2, 4-8, 9b-14a, 18-21 (NLT2)
And with that, Paul added a few more words of encouragement as he brought his letter to a close. Now, let me give you a little background in order for you to better understand the nature of this letter. Some believe Paul suffered from poor eyesight. Because of his limited vision, it was difficult for him to write the words. So, he usually dictated his letters to others. But, not this letter. Paul wrote it himself by hand. With this being the case, we can see just how important and personal this topic was for Paul. And, Paul wrote this in less-than-ideal conditions. In fact, he was imprisoned at the time in Rome for preaching the Gospel there. It was just like Paul to write a letter about freeing others while he sat there in a jail cell. Maybe you or I would have been writing letters that screamed: “Get me out of this place!” But, not Paul. There he was sitting in a prison cell, stripped of his freedom. Yet, he took the time to write a letter seeking to gain the freedom of someone else.
The recipient of this letter was a man named Philemon who lived in the City of Colossae in what is now modern-day Turkey. We can glean from this letter that Philemon was a Gentile who Paul had converted during his Third Missionary journey into the region that included Colossae. Although Paul didn’t personally preach in Colossae, he was very active in nearby Ephesus where Philemon was visiting when he encountered Paul’s delivery of the Gospel message. The Good News of Jesus Christ resonated with Philemon and he surrendered his life to Him.
Philemon was a wealthy man. We can see this by the fact that he owned a house so large that it could serve as a home-church for Christians there in Colossae.[1] Philemon was very active in the church—for Paul referred to him as a “beloved co-worker.” In fact, Paul told Philemon: “I keep hearing about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all of God’s people.” Apparently, Philemon’s interactions with others had been like the coming of a New Year’s Day, for Paul tells Philemon that, “the hearts of the saints have been REFRESHED through you!” In this letter, Paul pinpoints where Philemon’s wealth and his faith would intersect. It would be at this intersection that Philemon’s faith, and especially his capacity to forgive, would be tested. You see, Philemon not only owned a spacious house, he owned a person as well. He owned a slave named Onesimus.
In order to better understand the relationship between Philemon and Onesimus, it helps to know a little bit about the status of slavery in ancient Roman society. Slaves were extremely valuable assets, particularly if the slave could be trusted. Sometimes their owners spent considerable time and money to provide a promising slave with an education or some occupational skill that would equip the slave to serve his master more fully. If a promising slave developed in such a way, he could be of great service in his master’s business affairs. The master could send his slave on a trip to another city to handle major business transactions whereby the slave would act as his legal agent. In doing so, the slave might be entrusted with large sums of money to complete some profitable business deal on his master’s behalf. But, along with handling such business affairs came a great temptation on the slave’s part. He could decide to breach the master’s trust and simply take the money and run. Escaping from one’s master required the slave to quickly remove himself far away from his master’s realm. If you were going to be a successful run-away slave, you needed to have travel plans that often required passage by boat or caravan to some distant land where your master could not find you. Of course, if you escaped like this, it would be considered a treacherous betrayal of your master’s trust. Not only would the master have lost his valuable slave, but he also would have lost the investment of all expense that went into training and educating the slave. On top of that, the master would be out of all the stolen gold the slave used to fund his escape. When such a slave was so disloyal as to do such a thing (particularly after the master had been so good to him), the master would be furious at the escaped slave for his unfaithfulness and ingratitude![2]
Roman law was certainly on the master’s side to address such situations and the masters were quick to take advantage of those laws. First of all, it was completely acceptable in Roman society for people to be employed as “bounty-hunters” to track down the escaped slave. The rewards were lucrative, and these slave-hunters turned over every stone in hopes of recapturing the master’s “property.”[3] If the slave was captured, the consequences for him were dire. Once back in the master’s hands, the slave could be severely punished. In fact, the slave-owner could actually have the returned slave executed if his quest for vengeance had not sufficiently subsided.[4]
There is a strong indication in Paul’s letter to Philemon that Onesimus was exactly the kind of run-away slave that I have just described. In verses 18-19, Paul’s letter mentioned: “ If he [Onesimus] has WRONGED YOU IN ANY WAY OR OWES YOU ANYTHING, charge it to me. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it. And I won’t mention that you owe me your very soul!” We can infer from these comments that Onesimus had booked it with Philemon’s money. That’s why Paul alluded to what Onesimus owed Philemon. But, having spent the money to finance his escape, there was nothing left to repay Philemon. So Paul said, in effect: “Hey, put it my account—charge it to my bill!” And, Paul reminded Philemon that he had already received something priceless from Paul that more than cleared the bill. For Paul had shared with Philemon the Good News of Salvation through Jesus Christ—something that had saved Philemon’s very soul! And as Jesus once pointed out: “Is anything worth more than your soul?”[5]
Nevertheless, the fact remained: In all probability, Onesimus had stolen Philemon’s money and fled over 1,300 miles from Colossae all the way to Rome. But, something happened to Onesimus in Rome that he never expected. You see, it wasn’t any coincidence that Onesimus ran into Paul who shared with him the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Because of that, Onesimus’ life also was changed forever. Onesimus thought he had gained his freedom once he reached Rome. But, until he accepted Jesus into his heart, he hadn’t experienced what true freedom was all about. For as the Scriptures tell us, Jesus came to Onesimus, and all those like him, to “bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to captives and freedom to prisoners.”[6] And, as God’s Word proclaims, if Jesus sets you free, then you are truly free, indeed![7]
So, what message does Paul’s letter have for us this morning? Well, it depends on who you are. If you are like Philemon, then the lesson is about forgiving others. Maybe someone with whom you had a close relationship has done something grievously wrong to you. Whatever they may have done might well have been totally unjustified. Their treachery, by worldly standards, may seem inexcusable. The worldly response would typically be to display anger and hatred—to long for revenge. But, as Christians, Jesus teaches us that our reaction must be very different. We are called by Christ to restore that broken relationship through forgiveness. The restoration must come as soon as possible. In this regard, Jesus said, “If your brother sins against you, go to him and show him his fault. But do it privately, just between yourselves. If he listens to you, you have won your brother back.” Matthew 18:15 (TEV) Paul offers similar instructions to us: “If you are angry, don’t sin by nursing your grudge. Don’t let the sun go down with you still angry—get over it quickly; 27 for when you are angry, you give a mighty foothold to the devil.” Ephesians 4:26-27 (TLB)
The message is clear: Don’t let many “sunsets” go by before pursuing reconciliation. Rather, go to whoever hurt you without delay and do your part to make things right again. If you don’t do this, your hurt feelings will simmer and evolve into something worse. You will end up harboring anger and hurt feelings toward the wrongdoer in a way that is self-destructive. The problem is that we convince ourselves that they are the ones who need to come forward and beg forgiveness. But, the reality is that sometimes the one who has committed the offense isn’t even aware that they have offended you. They know that you have cut ties with them, but they remain mystified as to why that is the case. The longer you let those circumstances go on, the more difficult it becomes to forgive. Consequently, the gap between you and them widens into a mighty gulf. As time goes on, you may even forget exactly what it was that came between you. But, your pride stands in the way of restoration. Then, sometimes, something terrible happens: The person who offended you moves away and you lose track of them. Or worse yet, they move away permanently—in other words they die, thereby making the restoration you secretly longed for impossible. Then, your anger and hurt turns into shame and bitter regret.
The lesson that Paul teaches in his letter to Philemon is: “Don’t let that happen!” Mend bridges before it’s too late. The 19th century English poet, Philip James Bailey, expressed another dimension of what Paul was trying to show to Philemon. Bailey said, “They who forgive most shall be most forgiven.”[8] You see, Philemon was like any one of us—he needed to be gracious in granting forgiveness to others because he needed Jesus to grant even more forgiveness to himself. Now, we have no record of how Philemon reacted to Paul’s request. When Onesimus came knocking upon his door, did Philemon call the Roman cops and have him arrested? Or, did he receive Onesimus with open arms like the father of the Prodigal Son? Earlier when I read the letter to Philemon, I left out a part that now comes into play. After making his request for Onesimus’ freedom, Paul told Philemon this: 15 It seems Onesimus ran away for a little while so that you could have him back forever. 16 He is no longer like a slave to you. He is more than a slave, for he is a beloved brother, especially to me. Now he will mean much more to you, both as a man and as a brother in the Lord. 17 So if you consider me your partner, welcome him as you would welcome me.” When Paul put it in these terms, I have no doubt that Philemon’s faith compelled him to show Onesimus brotherly mercy. And here’s the wonderful thing: In doing so, Philemon not only freed Onesimus, but also freed himself in a way that only Christ’s love can make possible.
But, maybe you don’t identify as much with Philemon as you do with Onesimus. You know in your heart that you’ve done something to a friend or family member that was clearly wrong. Perhaps the person you hurt doesn’t even realize it was you who harmed them. Often people cause harm by spreading malicious gossip about others. Sometimes they secretly cheat friends or loved ones, or even stoop to the criminal level and embezzle money from someone who trusts them. In climbing the corporate ladder, they back-stab a co-worker to gain that promotion, but their “friend” was left in their same, old position. Yes, we can be like Onesimus in a thousand illicit ways. But, if you “fess-up” about whatever wrongful thing you’ve done, there are going to be dire consequences. You are going to have to pay for your hurtful actions in some costly way. It might cause great embarrassment to you. Maybe you’ll get sued. Maybe the Commonwealth Attorney could get involved. So, going to the person you wronged confronts you with a difficult choice: Should you do it and clear the matter from your conscience, and face the music (however unpleasant the tune may be)? Or, will you let it continue to fester inside you until one day your heart becomes so consumed with guilt that you can’t even begin to ask for forgiveness. The latter choice would be a tragic thing—for then your guilt sadly becomes a fatal part of you.
But, Onesimus didn’t let it come to that. Paul likely told him what Jesus had said about reconciling with someone when you’ve done them wrong. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus taught the following: 23 “So if you are standing before the altar in the Temple, offering a sacrifice to God, and suddenly remember that a friend has something against you, 24 leave your sacrifice there beside the altar and go and apologize and be reconciled to him, and then come and offer your sacrifice to God.” Matthew 5:23-24 (TLB) Jesus’ words would have been quite shocking to any pious listener who thought nothing should come before their worship of God—particularly their “standing before the altar in the Temple.” But, Jesus warned them, as he warns us today, that you can’t have a right relationship with God during church service, if you fail to have a right relationship with your fellow human beings outside of church. It is clear that Onesimus realized the importance of this teaching and he was determined to follow it. In fact, as Paul’s letter makes clear, Onesimus was the one who delivered Paul’s letter to Philemon—not knowing what his response would be.
And finally, perhaps you are like neither Philemon nor Onesimus. Rather, maybe you find yourself in a position much like Paul’s. You are in the middle. The wrongdoer wants to make amends but seeks your intervention. So, they ask you to become involved in making the restoration of a broken relationship a reality. This could put you in a difficult position because you are on good terms with both parties. And so, your gut reaction may be not to become involved. You might even try to convince yourself that “keeping your nose out of their business” is the prudent thing to do. In some situations that could be true—so, make certain to prayerfully ask for God’s guidance before plunging in. But, if the Holy Spirit brings to your mind this letter of Paul to Philemon, it’s probably a sign for you to assist in the restoration as best you can.
The brothers, Bear and Bo Rinehart, of the band, Need to Breathe, co-wrote a song entitled, “Be More Heart and Less Attack.”[9] The lyrics would have been endorsed by Paul and would have been welcome music to the ears of both Philemon and Onesimus. Verse 1 goes like this:
And, verse 4 renews this theme with this:
“Ever growing, steadfast / AND IF NEED, BE THE ONE THAT’S IN THE GAP / Be the never turning back / Twice the heart any man could have.”
You see, there are a lot of cracked relationships between people for which there presently is no light shining. We are called to share the love of Christ with those who find themselves estranged from a family member or former friend. In doing so, we can light the path toward reconciliation. In writing his letter to Philemon, that is exactly what Paul did. A broken relationship between friends and family members can be as ugly as a camel’s back—and just as smelly. Jesus wants us to put His love in action by seeking to mend the camel’s back of such broken relationships. Sure, it may be messy, but Jesus never promised us the Christian life would be easy. So, if the “gap” needs filling, roll up your sleeves and start filling it with the love of Christ!
Yes, New Year’s is a refreshing time that allows many things to begin anew. Paul’s letter to Philemon reminds us of that. And so, we are called to “ring-out” the old anger, hate and bitterness of the past. It’s time to “ring-in” the new blessings of hope that come with the peace, joy and love of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Maybe you are in the position of Philemon, or possibly Onesimus, or even Paul (or perhaps a little of each one). Whatever the case may be: Seek the freedom that will be yours through a restored relationship with others. It’s a freedom that will enhance your relationship with the Lord in ways you have never imagined. What a refreshing way to start the New Year!
Let us pray.
Darvin Satterwhite, Pastor
Forest Hill Baptist Church
December 31, 2023
©2023 All Rights Reserved as follows:
Anyone is at liberty to use this sermon or any portions thereof for educational or religious purposes, with or without credit. The pastor believes the material presented herein to be true to the teaching of Scripture, and desires to further, not restrict, its potential use as an aid in the study of God’s Word. The publication of this material is a grace ministry of Forest Hill Baptist Church in Louisa, Virginia.
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[1] Easton, M. G. 1893. In Illustrated Bible Dictionary and Treasury of Biblical History, Biography, Geography, Doctrine, and Literature. New York: Harper & Brothers.
[2] Wall, Robert W. 1993. Colossians & Philemon. The IVP New Testament Commentary Series. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.
[3] Keith Bradley, “Resisting Slavery in Ancient Rome,” https://www.bbc.co.uk/ history/ancient/romans/slavery_01.shtml (February 2, 2017).
[4] Wall, Robert W. 1993. Colossians & Philemon. The IVP New Testament Commentary Series. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.
[5] Matthew 16:26 “And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?” (NLT2)
[6] Isaiah 61:1 “The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, Because the LORD has anointed me To bring good news to the afflicted; He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to captives And freedom to prisoners.” (NASB)
[7] John 8:36 “So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.” (NASB)
[8] Philip James Bailey (1816-1902) Draper, Edythe. Draper's Book of Quotations for the Christian World. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 1992. WORDsearch CROSS e-book, page 220.
[9] Bear Rinehart & Bo Rinehart, “Be More Heart and Less Attack,” Needtobreathe, Album: “Rivers in the Wasteland,” (2014).
